00:00
00:00
Belthagor
Writer, Musician, and Animator of simple-drawn things.

Age 33, Male

In between colleges

New York

Joined on 6/25/12

Level:
24
Exp Points:
6,030 / 6,400
Exp Rank:
7,314
Vote Power:
6.55 votes
Audio Scouts
2
Art Scouts
1
Rank:
Scout
Global Rank:
42,716
Blams:
10
Saves:
201
B/P Bonus:
4%
Whistle:
Bronze
Medals:
684
Supporter:
1y 7m 28d

List of Speeches Rated E to T, 2/2

Posted by Belthagor - January 15th, 2022


Hello everyone. With one my speeches being deleted without any reason given, I thought I would start posting these in text form in a newspost. (2/2)


The final final vocal project


You know, if theres one thing I've noticed in differences between many parts of Europe and the US -It's the way people think of alcohol. In the US alcohol is strictly not allowed until age 21, and this is great, however certain traditions in the US prevent it from reaching its full potential. Unlike in Europe, where at a young person's birthday, they may be given a small glass of wine, with food to prevent them from getting drunk, and possibly some water as well, in the US most people drink when they turn 21, except they don't drink in normal amounts, because they have never seen it before, in fact it is custom to give a young person a glass of champagne at a celebration [In Europe]. And why not? They're with family and they are in the comfort and safety of their apartment during that time. People in the US, while still young but over 21 have never seen alcohol before, so they think to themselves that they need to drink as much as possible at one single time, leading to an overdose or even death. There are mostly younger people who die of alcohol poisoning in the US by statistics. This is obviously a problem. For a 21 year old to think that they need to drink as much as possible as soon as they are able to. You know that that's stupid right? I guess young people in the US, who drink at a celebration [when they are over 21], because they have not had a small glass of wine or a beer or something early on, in a social environment, fully trust people who they do not know very well, at a bar, or a party, and they are taking a major risk. European people, while in new company or company of colleagues usually have a three drink maximum. It's simply an accepted tradition, but people in the US learn about alcohol at an age that is far too late for them to be aware of the consequences of drinking irresponsibly, and environments which are okay to drink in, along with environments which are really not. You don't have any experience here, so you end up doing bad things for your well being, without traditions......


The world's most awesome script


A family are shopping at a large store for food. The father decides to open a bag of mixed nuts and sample them, and then they pass by while with their cart after he grabs a handful... he eventually loops back and takes another sample from the now open bag of nuts.

The son interrupts after his dad says they are free samples by saying "I don't think the same principles apply." He ignores him and then moves on with the cart and then grabs and opens a toblerone bar, which he is eating on the way around the store to finish the grocery list. The manager and an employee are walking towards them and ask them "did you open this bag of mixed nuts." The manager pauses, the father answers "No, it was open already, I just took a free sample." The manager says "What about the toblerone?" The father says he opened the toblerone because there is no way to deny it. The manager asks "Are you planning on buying it?" The father answers "I'm just trying free samples." We finished our shopping list, but maybe next time, we'll buy it. We don't know. We will see. The manager says "Since you opened the toblerone, you need to buy the toblerone." The father says he will buy it, but that the store should treat the customers better at checkout. They drive home. Fin.


Old Language Related Memories


Jokes aside, I thought I would update this...


A long time ago, when I was much younger and still learning language, I fell in love with someone who will not be named for legal reasons. Anyway, we were traveling to Bulgaria and after the plane flight, my mother spoke to my aunt saying "He fell in love with a typical French woman." I immediately said "How can you call her a typical French woman? She's the most wonderful French woman in the entire world! There was a part to this I didn't say it out loud but thought to myself when hearing the word typical. I tried to imagine it in the positive side and wondered... Does ... that ... mean ... that ... all ... French ... Women ... are like... ... ...*


I guess the pauses between each word I said to myself were out of joy. It wasn't love at this point, it was Awe. Because if the person I fell in love with is a typical French woman, then all or at least the majority of French women would be similar to her. I was overwhelmed with joy and excitement at this point, because even if we couldn't be in a relationship when I am older, I could date almost any other French woman there is.


Beans Speech Remade


You know, I'm going to share something that will completely change the way you think about spending money. A long while ago, when I was a child, food was less abundant in Bulgaria, so I had an ingenious idea -That we would buy the least expensive food, which was beans at the time, costing about 60 cents a bag. Many other people thought this way, so we were able to feed ourselves. We made it. It took hours to cook and the stoves in Europe run on electricity instead of gas, which by the way, happens to be less expensive than electricity, so in reality it was the most expensive food, because of the amount of fuel used during the time required to cook it. Bulgaria is not a very rich country, so we spend resources where we have the most of them. The effort required to do something uses a combination of resources, usually 3 or more. Time is a constant, labor is the second constant, and the third resource and onward varies depending on what a person is trying to do. A bit of backstory that helps highlight the situation to Bulgaria's financial poverty... After the collapse of the Soviet Union, many countries returned to Capitalism, of course, when something is newer, people don't know how to think, because they aren't used to it, they need more time to catch up to something older, so any change is negative at first, especially an entire political system. For a while, there were very few business owners, previously all businesses were Government owned, there were no rich people to make their own business, it was chaos. This lasted for a while, although I was born a bit later. Anyway, the last words I want to leave you with is that theres more factors to economics than just supply and demand, and you have to take all them into account when making financial decisions. And the grand finale? -If everyone brought the cheapest healthy food available, no I don't mean chips and the like, then it would eventually become the most expensive food, and then move on to the next. So theres really a lot of things to think about from these examples. P.S. Although, from experimentation, which I remembered recently, you can soak beans in water overnight and then they only take half an hour to cook. If I recall correctly, I wondered what would happen if we leave them in water for a while before cooking them, and asked my dad. He said to put water on a sponge which we had used for cleaning, the sponge absorbed the water. While I was holding it in my hand I replied "I'm not sure if this would take longer to cook or shorter [by which I meant if the beans were soaked with water while comparing them to the sponge in my hand.] He replied that it was a good idea, and we tried. The only negative thing is that they tasted a bit less good than before, but it saved a lot of effort cooking them... [Realistically, if I were to cook beans or even something which requires a shorter soak in water, like lentils, I would most definitely do it in both Bulgaria and the US. Here because the stoves run on natural gas, which is a non-renewable resource, and pollutes by creating carbon dioxide in the atmosphere when lit. This way the food would cook in 1/4th the time, so it would pollute less if a lot of people in the US did this.


Real Caffeine is Bitter


You know, in the past I've drank tea and coffee, although in Europe it is generally served in small cups. I remember many times when I have traveled, I would always pick tea, occasionally coffee, on the plane, or in the airport. It made sense, as I'm young it would of benefit to boost my energy and thought process, because I still have a lot to learn about the world, and street smarts to gain. I should be awake to best observe the way people talk to each other and socialize, etc. etc.

Anyway, from many, momentary, experiences with small cups of coffees and teas I have come to the conclusion, which is partly based on a story about wine in Bulgaria, that is in regards to coffee, which is as follows: Caffiene is a drink of time, as in it gives you time, or rather, more time, to stay awake and to gain experience in life, and in a way, real coffee or tea is bitter, just like the passing of time, and strong like a life well lived; I will not allow myself sweetened coffee or tea, so I know what to expect moving forward.


My first Encounter with a Wasp


A long time ago, in Bulgaria, somewhere around age 4, I was walking outside with my mother from grocery shopping. I saw a wasp for the first time, and was quite annoyed by it, even though it was calmly flying around, it might sting me, as there have been stories on TV of that happening in Bulgaria. Anyway, I grabbed it, to my mother's surprise, and then rubbed its stinger on the pavement until it tore apart to pieces followed by stepping on it, in order to safely remove the chance of being stung. My mother looked at me funny. I replied "I don't like these... they should be exterminated. Although the big ones [bees] are more dangerous [to people]. I added "You have to catch them slowly, by the sides of their bodies [so that they can't harm you by stinging you,] not in the way that you would move your arm slowly and then quickly, similar to the way you would squish a mosquito. Slow movement the entire time." I then added. "The larger ones are heavier so they have more powerful wings and could escape my small two fingers because of their size." That was the first and only time I killed a wasp. My mother told me that it is dangerous to do so, and best to ignore them. In a way, I still think wasps and even bees should be exterminated, they are the only nuisance that still bothers people in cities and too many stings can kill a person. Based on how aggressive the queen is, that determines the mood of the whole colony, and can create killer-bees/wasps. God-Forbid if flowers were not pollinated (sarcasm), and the majority of people prefer sugar over honey anyway. Thoughts?

P.S. It's understandable that this speech may throw some of you off at first, but think of it this way: If an insect, such as a spider that you know is poisonous is on the wall of your apartment, wouldn't you squish it before it has the chance to bite you and kill you, even if it is docile at the moment.


If a country had gold but no food.


If a country had gold but no food, what would you do? I remember a long time ago when I was four years old and my father asked me this, to which I replied that I would trade gold for food. It seems like a simple question, trading money for sustenance but is actually a more complex question as I understood it. The whole thought process written out in text form behind the question is as follows: If you were in charge of a country that had gold, but for some reason, drought or other, did not have enough food during a harvesting season, would you trade gold bars from the treasury for food from another country, while keeping in mind that if you do so, then you would be able to print less money, because a country can print only as much money as the amount of gold [bars] in its treasury without causing inflation at any given time. I guess it would make the country poorer but would feed the country when it doesn't have enough food, so I said that I would trade. He passed away recently but would probably like to be remembered through this question and my reply to it. I guess this explains a bit about Europe, in a way. You see, in Europe we speak very little, or write very little, but discuss multitudes through our speech and writing. And besides, if another country were to trade food, past its surplus, it would need an incentive to do so, because food would be more expensive in that country temporarily due to there being less of it during a season.


Si un país tuviera oro pero no comida ... (MajoraCats)


Si un país tuviera oro pero no comida, ¿Qué harías? Recuerdo hace mucho tiempo cuando tenía cuatro años y mi padre me preguntó esto, a lo que le respondí que cambiaría oro por comida. Pregunta simple, intercambiar dinero por sustento, pero en realidad es una pregunta más compleja tal como la entendí. Todo el proceso de pensamiento escrito en forma de texto detrás de la pregunta es el siguiente: si estuvieras a cargo de un país que tiene oro, pero por algunos razón, por sequía u otra, no tiene suficiente comida durante la temporada de cosecha, ¿cambiaría lingotes de oro de su tesoro por comida de otro país, teniendo en cuenta que si lo haces, entonces podrías imprimir menos dinero? porque un país solo puede imprimir tanto dinero como la cantidad de [barras] de oro en su tesorería sin causar inflación en un momento dado. Supongo que haría al país más pobre pero lo alimentaría cuando no tenga suficiente comida, así que le dije que lo cambiaría. Falleció recientemente, pero probablemente me gustaría que me recordaran a través de esta pregunta y mi respuesta. Supongo que esto explica un poco sobre Europa, de alguna manera. Verán, en Europa hablamos muy poco o escribimos muy poco, pero discutimos en multitudes a través de nuestro discurso y escritura. Y además, si otro país comercializara alimentos, más allá de su excedente, necesitaría un incentivo para hacerlo, porque los alimentos serían más caros en ese país temporalmente debido a que hay menos durante una temporada


Kindergarten Speech (Redone)


In Kindergarten on the fourth day I was there, we had time in the fenced playground around the building. I was about to go and play with some other kids but I wanted some... particular toy, but they gave me another so I didn't want to play -at all-. The kids went somewhere else while I got mad and started yelling. The adults let me blow off some steam by myself. Eventually I got sweaty and then a breeze came, by nap time I had a high fever and I felt so sick that I ran home. No one saw me, I was sort of like a ninja. My grandma was surprised when I showed up on the doorstep. But I didn't mention anything about just deciding to leave. While I lay in bed in another room, my grandma's friend, mother of one of the teachers, got a call from her daughter, and she came over and rang our doorbell. "Your son left school." Said Laura, who was the mother of the teacher. My grandmother replied "Yes, of course, I know, he's here." When she'd seen me with my fever, she just assumed they had let me go home early, because she's a doctor, and they're just teachers! Laura called her daughter's cellphone and relieved her of any concerns she could have about my mysterious absence. A few hours later, everyone figured out what had happened and we all had a great laugh! I was filled with joy to see my family earlier that day as well. And I got to bask in the glory of the unofficially early end of kindergarten for the day due to my "ninja talents." For the rest of the day I just played and talked with other kids in the building... while remaining... fully... supervised. My family decided it was time to stop going to kindergarten until regular, real school starts, as in Europe it is optional, I'm not sure about the US though... They don't really teach you anything in it anyway, it's basically a daycare.


The ones with closed eyes


We the ones with closed eyes...

Who lived so carefully

And prevented adventures

Yet gained not fame nor fortune

And were not fortunate to begin with

Preventing all our problems also ... ... ...

Prevents all opportunities possible.


PrincessPubert's Debut


Belthagor's Voice: "Hello everyone! I am looking for a voice actor"

PrincessPubert: "I'll do it."

Belthagor: "Okay but first you need to express how much you like working for me."

PrincessPubert: "uhh."

Belthagor: "Here's your line."

*Pause*

Belthagor: "Say it."

PrincessPubert: "My name is PrincessPubert and I like...

*belthagor interupts: "LOVE"

PrincessPubert: "...Love... my job as a voice actor for belthagor"

PrincessPubert begins laughing nervously in disbelief at this statement she just said

Belthagor: "Say it... say it again."

PrincessPubert: "MY NAME IS PRINCESSPUBERT AND I... (Vomits mildly inside mouth and swallows it) ..."LOVE MY JOB AS A VOICE ACTOR FOR BELTHAGOR!!!!"

Belthagor: "Good."

Belthagor: "You've got the job."


In regards to people who fear the way of human progress...


I thought I'd explain something about a previous speech I made before the world goes blind. To quote it "Potential improvements being taken away in society over and over, it's really a form of justice." It seems like a cruel thing to say, but if you think deeper, it's truly a kind thing to say. A long time ago Charlie Chaplin mentioned something about people who fear the way of human progress, by which he meant that if cruelty continues on earth, there would be no progress. Well, let me play devils advocate: A lack of progress would lead to a lot of problems on earth, so people would be forced to rise above those problems, which would force them to act nicer in society. [Sigh... once again assuming it'd be obvious yet requiring explanation. People would be forced to act nicer in order to fuel the intellect of other, younger people to its maturity.] So in reality, decay, and lack of progress, is the greatest thing that can happen, so long it is in area where people in power are forced to do things like provide greater rights for people, and change entire laws, in order to make society better, and solve that decay from continuing in vital areas. Though I doubt this will get anywhere. In 2106 the earth was so hot that governments banned the use of air conditioning in order to cool it a bit. It was unbearable except during winter. This lasted six years and then the earth cooled down a bit. There were still air conditioners in vital places such as hospitals. Fans were still allowed, however the only way we were able to think of how to reverse global warming was by using less energy, so realistically, I may not have won in my counter arguement, Charlie. That eventually, through a lack of progress, cruelty will end permanently. [Except I actually won completely... because everyone adored you, while ignoring or disliking my viewpoint on this, which lead to a balance between good and horrible periods of time, continuing both things, instead of removing horrible periods of time, permanently. (To explain.)] So we, in reality, require a lack of progress, for our own well-being and calmness. [Which will then lead to a utopia with continuing progress.]


Look away from the screen, I'm embarrassing us.


In case you seriously don't like my speech the way it is composed...

and would prefer I don't present it in front of you.

LOOK AWAY FROM THE SCREEN! (And take off your headphones.)

"My snoogykins bunkerbooble wuddlepooh honeylips... My smoochiesweetie kissiedoodle loveypook. My foofiefoof wuddledumpling schnookieloveypie wunnykin cuddlycakes. My Foofiemoofie WuddleCuddlyDumpling. My CuddlySmoochCute GoobleBoobleFoof! My PoochieBunny WuggyWoogleCute PoofHead!! ... *Sigh* ... My... WuggyWunnyBunch SmoochLoveyBunny... My... my MoofieDumpling Moopiekin WookumWunny SnoogleBoo Nookumsnoogle CuddlyDumplings Wunnyboo. My honeysmooch. My woogycake. My WuggySchnookum WookieLips SweetiePie SchnookumBunny Loveywookumpums googoodoodoo SnuggySchookumpums!!! ... *Tired Sigh* ... When I hear your voice it's like I have a miniature flashlight to show me the ground I'm stepping on surrounded by an ocean of darkness so that I don't step on a snake while trotting the barren wasteland underneath, the bright color matches your hair as I point it towards the ground in front of me, a beautiful golden sparkle and long lasting energy in it... I love you."


Belthagor's 67th Speech:


I refuse to eat food if a woman burned her hand cooking it.


68'th:


One summer we were going on vacation to Europe for break from school. We arrived in the Airport and took our first flight, we had a connecting flight, you see. There was a dog that was sniffing for inappropriate things among people's personal carry on luggage. The dog and his owner, an officer, came over to our luggage per policy, while walking through the airport. The dog was upset, because it was a fairly large dog, and most people were afraid of it, even though they were not carrying anything illegal, most security dogs are tiny, you see. They were nervous because it might bite, and many people have a natural fear of dogs. I was young and decided to pet the dog when its owner walked near us, which boosted its mood. It licked my mother's purse. The officer continued filling his quota, and upon finishing came over to thank us for cheering his dog up. He talked for a short while and said "You know my dog has really been feeling down lately, because everyone is cautious around it. Thank you so much." My mother smiled and we continued onward to Europe on our connecting flight.


(1/2):


https://refurbishedbelthagor.newgrounds.com/news/post/1242300


1

Comments

Comments ain't a thing here.